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Lounge => General Discussion => Topic started by: hewritez on November 25, 2016, 04:01:42 AM

Title: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: hewritez on November 25, 2016, 04:01:42 AM
Do you indulge it, shut it down, ignore it???

So I am at my uncle's house for Thanksgiving this year.
He lives in a rich suburb of L.A.
Our family and friends are uniformly successful Indian professionals: doctors, dentists, businessmen etc.

I'm an artist. And gay.
Needless to say I'm the odd one out.
Without fail the conversation turned to the election, at which point numerous people made condescending remarks towards blacks and latinos.

Again, I'm the odd one out. Most of my significant others have been blacks and latinos.
I found myself doing things I wish I didn't: nodding along, fake laughing, shrugging my shoulders.
Basically giving an "oh really? haha!" kind of tea

I felt uncomfortable but didn't feel it was my place to give a fucking lecture on race to a room full of confused brown republicans.

Am I wrong for saying nothing? I just don't know when to turn it on and off.
I feel like, because these were my parents' people, I didn't have a place to stand my ground.

Do y'all find yourself in similar positions? Have you ever been exposed to racial insensitivity and didn't know what to do about it? Or chose to ignore it to keep from getting embroiled in something that ultimately wasn't worth the effort?
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Kaeli. on November 25, 2016, 04:07:13 AM
Ur supposed to clock the mess
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: GYNandTONIC on November 25, 2016, 04:19:12 AM
There are times when I indulge and others where I feel it's not worth the battle.

I would never correct someone because of their political views, however if you're using a party as a blanket to cover up your own ignorance then I'm going to check you. It doesn't have to be an argument, simply state your piece and keep it moving.

Spaces like work, I don't discuss those things at all. Typically light hearted situations too. A family table is fair game tho. Just pick your battles wisely, make sure you have facts to back up your views, state your thoughts with conviction, and offer the person a cocktail or a second plate to show you're unbothered.

The biggest thing I notice when people want to stand up is that their facts aren't always in line and/or they speak dismissively or passively.
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Admin on November 25, 2016, 05:29:38 AM
Quote from: sadiddy? on November 25, 2016, 04:51:46 AM
D
Wait
Never saw it from that perspective :wellheythere:
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: ham sandwich on November 25, 2016, 06:11:46 AM
I love all shades of dick

:whatfuneralbill:
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Winter Santiaga on November 25, 2016, 06:45:49 AM
I took my aunt's best friend to task over the summer respectfully and with conviction and facts as was so rightfully mentioned earlier. The conversation wasnt centered around racial insensitivity but ignorance when it came to religion, black liberation and the upcoming election.

My Aunt's friend was not here for me because I made her question things she never gave pause to. However, as soon as I stepped in the house for dinner yesterday she was all over me, telling me how she didn't understand what I was explaining to her previously but now she gets it and is basically afraid of what a Trump presidency will lead to. 

Point is, the dinner table and family settings are the best place to evoke change. It's a safe environment to voice your opinions. Times are beginning to repeat itself and we can all do are part to stop the spread of misinformation by speaking up. I hope liberal whites had real discussions with their Trump supporting families this Thanksgiving.
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Real on November 25, 2016, 10:55:47 AM
Quote from: hewritez on November 25, 2016, 04:01:42 AM

Am I wrong for saying nothing?

Yes imo
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Real on November 25, 2016, 10:56:30 AM
Quote from: Tahj Zezo. on November 25, 2016, 10:51:03 AM
I know how you feel.

It's easy to say "clock it", but sometimes it's just uncomfortable and you're just not in the mood for a battle.

We had some Jamaican family friends round for lunch over summer and they started saying derogatory mess about the trans community. They don't know my tea. Kii.

I didn't nod or shrug.

I just gave a  :usuresis:

And my Mum was like  :damselindistress:

Lol

But you're not trans lol
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Real on November 25, 2016, 10:56:49 AM
Are u :diddraispoot:
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: brocka4life on November 25, 2016, 10:56:49 AM
I think part of the reason it continues is because people don't challenge it on the spot.
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: SouravMay on November 25, 2016, 12:31:47 PM
I am quick to start a FIRESTORM of a debate at the slightest thing lol

Ended some friendships over some petty shit like monopoly, so a racially ignorant mess will clocked and duked owt immediately
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: 4 fucking k on November 25, 2016, 12:33:52 PM
n

Let's be real, you didn't say anything cause it didn't really bothered you. Just thinking "Oh dated latinos and blacks!" doesn't mean shit cause I'm sure if they started to slander the gays you would get in your feelings real quick.
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Glenda on November 25, 2016, 12:37:10 PM
You should have said something if it really affected you and made you feel some type of way.
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: GRAND on November 25, 2016, 12:39:01 PM
v

Well you don't always have to stand up and fight

But to sit there and kii at it...

  :udontlookok:
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Admin on November 25, 2016, 12:39:42 PM
Quote from: شيطان on November 25, 2016, 12:31:47 PM
Ended some friendships over some petty shit like monopoly
:guys: really
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Glenda on November 25, 2016, 12:40:52 PM
Quote from: GRAND SUPREME MARSHALL on November 25, 2016, 12:39:01 PM
But to sit there and kii at it...

  :udontlookok:

!!!!!

s
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Boomz on November 25, 2016, 12:52:49 PM
Quote from: Real on November 25, 2016, 10:56:49 AM
Are u :diddraispoot:

I'm hunched.

He's gay. It falls under the same umbrella. LGBTQ mess or what have u...
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Real on November 25, 2016, 01:01:30 PM
Quote from: شيطان on November 25, 2016, 12:31:47 PM
I am quick to start a FIRESTORM of a debate at the slightest thing lol

We know :usuresis:
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Vonc2002 on November 25, 2016, 01:02:11 PM
I dont condone and wont act like i do
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: wizzy on November 25, 2016, 01:33:35 PM
Quote from: squid on November 25, 2016, 05:29:38 AM
Quote from: sadiddy? on November 25, 2016, 04:51:46 AM
D
Wait
Never saw it from that perspective :wellheythere:
xbvx
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: wizzy on November 25, 2016, 01:35:40 PM
Ive either removed myself or dragged people for it
Depends on how I feel and if it seems worth it
Title: Re: Racial Insensitivity...
Post by: Vonc2002 on November 25, 2016, 01:51:22 PM
Quote from: Uni on November 25, 2016, 01:35:40 PM
Ive either removed myself or dragged people for it
Depends on how I feel and if it seems worth it
At the very least remove urself. Im kinda ready to drag 'writez and his fckn family tbrfhwyrn