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QuoteThe last two months has been very hard for me. I grew tired of suppressing myself and hiding who I was in fear of being misunderstood my whole life. It has caused me to live in a web of lies, self-deception, and turbulence. I've sought to analyze and cut off all the toxic people in my life only to find out the most toxic person I knew was myself. And you can't cut yourself off. Suicide isn't justice. If you don't like yourself, make the effort every day to be the best version of your truest self. Guilt & self loathing isn't humility. Working hard on being better is. From opening up about my dissociation and my gender identity on my YouTube to assessing all of my sins introspectively, facing myself has really led to a literal crippling depression. Getting harder to leave the house. Getting harder to work on the things you thought you were passionate about. Or even walking to the store to feed myself has left me fatigued & out of breath by the 2nd block. This isn't a post for pity but to maybe inspire a realization in others. The realization that not being yourself has very catastrophic consequences. Suppressing who you are leads to very self-sabotaging behavior. Saying "be yourself" isn't just a cliche. Beyond surface level, this means owning all the darkest parts of yourself.
#egodeath #depression #dissociation #agender #genderdysphoria #suicidalideation #selfhelp #therapy #beyourself