So there was this guy I used to kind of date on and off. He told me he loves me and I said thank you, I didn't want a proper relationship as it wouldn't have worked (he could be very controlling and almost stalkerish, but at the same time he was one of the most passionate and sweet guys I have ever encountered).
I had been ignoring his last message for about 10 months. I wake up after a wild night out, only to find out I texted him back and he wanted to meet up. I always told myself I wouldn't do it again, but as he said he really wasn't doing well I felt sorry for him (and I gotta admit that I did miss him too). So my idea was to kinda try a friends with benefits mess with him tbqfh.
Long story short, I agree to meet up with him and he is sick. Very sick. Lost all his hair, eyebrows & lashes and actually doesn't know what kind of sickness he has, as the doctors are unable to tell him up at this point. But losing all your hair is never a good sign...
While he was telling me all this I felt like a horrible person. I had been ignoring him for almost a year, while he was going through the shittiest time of his life. He said that at one point it got so bad that he didn't even know, whether he wanted to stay alive or not - that made me tear the fuck up. Furthermore he said that seeing me again had made him very happy.
My thing is, I did not tell him I am interested in anything romantic, but what if he is starting to think that? Since this whole thing with him has always been complicated, I'm really not looking to be with him romantically anymore and tbh the sickness doesn't make it easier. So ideally I would be there for him as a friend if he needs someone to talk to.
Now I'm asking myself the following: Do I tell him directly that I can only be his friend but I am not looking to get romantically involved again? Do I go one step further and not meet him again at all as it would make things easier for me? My fear is that this will crush him, as he still loves me (tbh). What if he does something stupid? What if he just passes away and I was being a selfish bitch.
My friends are saying the following:
1) I shouldn't have met him again in the first place.
2) It is not my fault that he is sick.
3) He is not my responsibility.
3) I am probably only meeting him again out of pity.
So the opinions of my friends were kind of heartless and I was looking for some alternate views on this from you guys. Don't know why I chose Bsource actually, since this place is ruthless af but at least y'all keep it real.
* I am not trying to exploit this guys story by making this topic, I am genuinely looking for some advice. Also I am on a 8 hour train ride and have lots of time on my hands at the moment.
