So two of my friends basically try to shame me for not catching up with them or messaging them etc.
It's like, they think I hate them, cause I didn't reply "haha" to a LATE meme. :udontlookok:
They still do something together without me. First of all, there's a whole god damn pandemic going on. I'm not gonna meet up with you every week. Second of all, I work 5 to 6 days a week, switching shifts every week. Sometimes (actually most of the time since I'm a loner anyway) I just wanna relax and get away from people. There's not much to do anyway since everything's closed.
They were offended that I didn't celebrate my 30th birthday with them a couple weeks ago. :disgusted: (I just celebrated with my parents and brother)
Am I being too harsh on them? :unbothered:
Uhh no
People that still to expect you to same social life and commitments during the pandemic are weird to me
they are out of line if they EXPECT you to meet up with them in this pandemic, period.
you could reply to the message tho lol
but as long as you're communicating your reasoning to them, they shouldn't be upset
Everybody should understand social distancing right now.
A kiki text won't hurt you though. Humans are social creatures. If you don't respond to people or show you have an interest in them, they'll stop trying to connect. Do you want to die alone? lol Even as an introvert we still need to put in a little effort every now and then.
Im the same way, but I try my best to contact my friends even if its once per week to say whats up. U would think that most ppl would understand there's a pandemic, but not everyone is like me and thinks the same way I do. So I gotta reach out to some degree. Communication is key - just let 'em know what's up and where ur mind is. Maybe they value ur friendship with them more than u think? Some folks are just yearning for social interaction and I get it. Just talk to them and clear the air.
I understand the meet up part cause I don't really want to go out and meet up with people. But the least you could do is send a text back. One of my friends have straight ignored my text messages and I just stop trying and now she's screaming that I'm against her when she WASN'T responding to me reaching out to HER
Nothing wrong with enjoying your "me" time.
But if you haven't done so already , it's probably a good idea to just be upfront with them about ur desire to be alone most times. This way, if they take it personally it's 100% on them, you've already told them what ur deal is and why u may not show up to the bar for drinks and dancing.
Like instead of just saying "ahh I don't feel like it today maybe next time" just cut into the peach cobbler and give them the tea full force.
And maybe encourage them to do more in-home stuff ? I have the girls over here all the time for dinner and drinks lol
And they always tell me how good of a time they had . Find new ways to mess a bit
Quote from: Scott. on December 09, 2020, 05:24:49 PM
I understand the meet up part cause I don't really want to go out and meet up with people. But the least you could do is send a text back. One of my friends have straight ignored my text messages and I just stop trying and now she's screaming that I'm against her when she WASN'T responding to me reaching out to HER
Oh yeah. I totally have a couple people that I only hear from them when I msg them. I just let them be and dont connect. But the ones that do respond and do show interest, those are the real 1s. And like any relationship, friendship is work, so even when I dont want to, I gotta try to stay connected with the real 1s. This pandemic has really showed me who's rly down. I dont wanna come off being that friend who keeps to himself.
Quote from: Gangsta Frecklez 👊🏾 on December 09, 2020, 05:27:37 PM
Nothing wrong with enjoying your "me" time.
But if you haven't done so already , it's probably a good idea to just be upfront with them about ur desire to be alone most times. This way, if they take it personally it's 100% on them, you've already told them what ur deal is and why u may not show up to the bar for drinks and dancing.
Like instead of just saying "ahh I don't feel like it today maybe next time" just cut into the peach cobbler and give them the tea full force.
That's good advice, thx babes. I think I'm gonna do that next time I see them.
But I also feel like we're growing apart in general. We literally have nothing in common anymore. We're not 20 anymore. I just came back from living overseas for two years and things have just changed.
But I should probably tell them like you said.
Quote from: 𝖘𝖖𝖚𝖎𝖉 on December 09, 2020, 05:45:38 PM
Quote from: Gangsta Frecklez 👊🏾 on December 09, 2020, 05:27:37 PM
Nothing wrong with enjoying your "me" time.
But if you haven't done so already , it's probably a good idea to just be upfront with them about ur desire to be alone most times. This way, if they take it personally it's 100% on them, you've already told them what ur deal is and why u may not show up to the bar for drinks and dancing.
Like instead of just saying "ahh I don't feel like it today maybe next time" just cut into the peach cobbler and give them the tea full force.
That's good advice, thx babes. I think I'm gonna do that next time I see them.
But I also feel like we're growing apart in general. We literally have nothing in common anymore. We're not 20 anymore. I just came back from living overseas for two years and things have just changed.
But I should probably tell them like you said.
awww.
Yeah, plus you telling them your undiluted teA will maybe help them realize that you're not the best fit for the group anymore . Obviously no need to tell them "I've outgrown you! Lolz" flat out , but gently stating how things are changing you for personally will send a message just as clear.
Simple communication relieves and prevents so many misunderstandings and mess. You'll feel much better once you come clean with them.
Luv u booskie ❤️❤️
I think you did the right thing Squid. Introverts find people to be extremely draining and insufferable. We love extemely hard ..but prefer to do it at a distance. We get our energy being alone while the extroverts get energy associating with others. My best friend can't fathom the thought of being alone or without having a man around her all the time and I be looking at her like ... :disgusted:
Quote from: Gangsta Frecklez 👊🏾 on December 09, 2020, 05:50:58 PM
Quote from: 𝖘𝖖𝖚𝖎𝖉 on December 09, 2020, 05:45:38 PM
Quote from: Gangsta Frecklez 👊🏾 on December 09, 2020, 05:27:37 PM
Nothing wrong with enjoying your "me" time.
But if you haven't done so already , it's probably a good idea to just be upfront with them about ur desire to be alone most times. This way, if they take it personally it's 100% on them, you've already told them what ur deal is and why u may not show up to the bar for drinks and dancing.
Like instead of just saying "ahh I don't feel like it today maybe next time" just cut into the peach cobbler and give them the tea full force.
That's good advice, thx babes. I think I'm gonna do that next time I see them.
But I also feel like we're growing apart in general. We literally have nothing in common anymore. We're not 20 anymore. I just came back from living overseas for two years and things have just changed.
But I should probably tell them like you said.
awww.
Yeah, plus you telling them your undiluted teA will maybe help them realize that you're not the best fit for the group anymore . Obviously no need to tell them "I've outgrown you! Lolz" flat out , but gently stating how things are changing you for personally will send a message just as clear.
Simple communication relieves and prevents so many misunderstandings and mess. You'll feel much better once you come clean with them.
Luv u booskie ❤️❤️
So true 💕
Luv you hun
Tm
g
g
g
g
g
g
g
g
g
g
g
g
:woohoo:
Quote from: Catherine Of Aragon on December 09, 2020, 05:53:08 PM
We get our energy being alone while the extroverts get energy associating with others. My best friend can't fathom the thought of being alone or without having a man around her all the time and I be looking at her like ... :disgusted:
!!!!
And there's nothing wrong witch each side of the spectrum.
I have another friend from Australia who is extremely outgoing as well. But we have a mutual understanding of us being opposites. I honestly love that, there's no hard feelings.
Are they 10?
they need to get over themselves. It's a fucking pandemic, introverted or not. People like this are selfish and never look outside of themselves for a moment
If they don't understand the way you move by now and still take it personally, then maybe you've outgrown each other and that's OK. I need my close friends to know exactly who i am
and to not judge me for it.
Quote from: Gangsta Frecklez 👊🏾 on December 09, 2020, 05:27:37 PM
Nothing wrong with enjoying your "me" time.
But if you haven't done so already , it's probably a good idea to just be upfront with them about ur desire to be alone most times. This way, if they take it personally it's 100% on them, you've already told them what ur deal is and why u may not show up to the bar for drinks and dancing.
Like instead of just saying "ahh I don't feel like it today maybe next time" just cut into the peach cobbler and give them the tea full force.
And maybe encourage them to do more in-home stuff ? I have the girls over here all the time for dinner and drinks lol
And they always tell me how good of a time they had . Find new ways to mess a bit
!!!!! :plzstop:
im still practicing this
Quote from: Brandy's Unconditional Ocean on December 09, 2020, 08:46:06 PM
Quote from: Gangsta Frecklez 👊🏾 on December 09, 2020, 05:27:37 PM
Nothing wrong with enjoying your "me" time.
But if you haven't done so already , it's probably a good idea to just be upfront with them about ur desire to be alone most times. This way, if they take it personally it's 100% on them, you've already told them what ur deal is and why u may not show up to the bar for drinks and dancing.
Like instead of just saying "ahh I don't feel like it today maybe next time" just cut into the peach cobbler and give them the tea full force.
And maybe encourage them to do more in-home stuff ? I have the girls over here all the time for dinner and drinks lol
And they always tell me how good of a time they had . Find new ways to mess a bit
!!!!! :plzstop:
im still practicing this
:sistas:
Quote from: Brandy's Unconditional Ocean on December 09, 2020, 08:44:42 PM
they need to get over themselves. It's a fucking pandemic, introverted or not. People like this are selfish and never look outside of themselves for a moment
If they don't understand the way you move by now and still take it personally, then maybe you've outgrown each other and that's OK. I need my close friends to know exactly who i am
and to not judge me for it.
That's true too
One of them still meets up with friends from other cities, drives up to 200 km or more just to hang. In Corona times. :disgusted:
Quote from: 𝖘𝖖𝖚𝖎𝖉 on December 09, 2020, 05:03:26 PM
So two of my friends basically try to shame me for not catching up with them or messaging them etc.
It's like, they think I hate them, cause I didn't reply "haha" to a LATE meme. :udontlookok:
They still do something together without me. First of all, there's a whole god damn pandemic going on. I'm not gonna meet up with you every week. Second of all, I work 5 to 6 days a week, switching shifts every week. Sometimes (actually most of the time since I'm a loner anyway) I just wanna relax and get away from people. There's not much to do anyway since everything's closed.
They were offended that I didn't celebrate my 30th birthday with them a couple weeks ago. :disgusted: (I just celebrated with my parents and brother)
Am I being too harsh on them? :unbothered:
I don't think you're being too harsh in terms of physically meeting but you're wrong for not returning their damn texts
:udontlookok:
I get like that too where someone sends me something extremely late tho. I don't laugh or react to it but I usually send something completely unrelated maybe a few days later to let them know I still care.
:traciandchelle:
It's not like he said he NEVER texts back. If he takes a few days and then explains why, i don't see the problem. Why don't they simply check on him and see how he's doing rather than assuming there's an issue? That's the problem. People make everything about them.
Quote from: Brandy's Unconditional Ocean on December 10, 2020, 06:45:15 AM
It's not like he said he NEVER texts back. If he takes a few days and then explains why, i don't see the problem. Why don't they simply check on him and see how he's doing rather than assuming there's an issue? That's the problem. People make everything about them.
that's not always the case though
Quote from: Brandy's Unconditional Ocean on December 10, 2020, 06:45:15 AM
It's not like he said he NEVER texts back. If he takes a few days and then explains why, i don't see the problem. Why don't they simply check on him and see how he's doing rather than assuming there's an issue? That's the problem. People make everything about them.
Completely agree with this!
What did I do? I think she's mad at me
:stressed:And talk to other people instead of just asking you directly. I'm pissed.
:fuming:
Quote from: 𝖘𝖖𝖚𝖎𝖉 on December 09, 2020, 05:03:26 PM
So two of my friends basically try to shame me for not catching up with them or messaging them etc.
It's like, they think I hate them, cause I didn't reply "haha" to a LATE meme. :udontlookok:
They still do something together without me. First of all, there's a whole god damn pandemic going on. I'm not gonna meet up with you every week. Second of all, I work 5 to 6 days a week, switching shifts every week. Sometimes (actually most of the time since I'm a loner anyway) I just wanna relax and get away from people. There's not much to do anyway since everything's closed.
They were offended that I didn't celebrate my 30th birthday with them a couple weeks ago. :disgusted: (I just celebrated with my parents and brother)
Am I being too harsh on them? :unbothered:
I think we could be the best of friends bby. :young:
Squid, i'm on the fence because the tea you give is very "meh...i'll call them when i can be bothered" and I can see that reading as you don't care about them, even more so if you just had a milestone birthday and didn't want them there :kii:
On the other hand, I HATE when bitches think they're entitled to your time or try lashing you for not giving the attention they want at any given moment :damselindistress: