Ok So I live in Oakland and have lived in the bay area for most of my life except when I lived in LA for 3 years after undergrad. Since your BF job is going to be in Redwood City and you are looking for a job in San Jose then you might as well live on the peninsula. It wouldn't make sense to live in the east bay, because you would want to shoot yourself everyday if you had to commute. Your best bet is San Jose, Foster City, Los Gatos, Palo Alto, Menlo Park, Moutain View, San Mateo or even Santa Clara. I have 2 dogs too, so it's going to take some work to find a place and you might have to pay a higher deposit. $4500 sounds really high unless you are looking in San Francisco proper. Otherwise if you guys are looking at a 1 bed room then you should be able to find a place for under 3K. San Jose is BIG and that's probably your best bet. Just stay out the east side there are a shit load of gangs over there and it's kind of grimy. These fucking hipsters and gentrification are pushing up the prices all over the bay area. But one word of advice is when you find a place jump on it as fast as you can. Set some google alerts for new apartment listings in the city you think you want to live in that way you can have as much of a head start as possible.