hmm first things first,
I noticed she opened with the phrases "my boyfriend" and "our kids", so yea ....
she really shouldn't be asking for conventional advice for an unconventional situation
but she's not linked to this man, so she's not link to that child yet. So she's not "wrong"
but ... in my opinion, because I have a half hellraiser sister
she should take the kid
having beef or separation between siblings always starts when one woman decides her children are different. It's not about you anymore, it's about your kids family
So she can exclude him to save a lil coin, but when she doesn't have it and his new girlfriend excludes her little hellraisers, and they come home crying because they can't spend time with their bro/sis, she looks like she'll be the first one in the street wanting baby mama drama
you really can't play those exclusion kinds of games with kids because it will come back to bite you