& if so, how did that affect the way you saw ppl until you met your first gay friend?
so are you admitting you're a gay guy?
this is for lesbians as well, so iman, don't be a stranger
Nahh. I've said it before on here but my mom had gay guy friends so it was easy.
She has a level of respect for gays.
I'm bisexual
:udontlookok:
even tho the gurs don't think im real. d
EDIT:
im just gonna say yes.
but I don't wanna get too personal
:receipts:
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
What a terrible situation for a child to be in. You don't even get to express yourself during the time where you need to be doing just that.
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
Omg I'm sorry to hear that bby
Quote from: charlie on May 03, 2016, 07:25:24 PM
I'm bisexual
:udontlookok:
dddhdhdhdccc
Hun I love ya but why do u mention this every chance you get
But to answer your question no I did not. My family was very open and accepting of me.
im white so...
Quote from: Nice Stereo. on May 03, 2016, 07:36:27 PM
Quote from: charlie on May 03, 2016, 07:25:24 PM
I'm bisexual
:udontlookok:
dddhdhdhdccc
Hun I love ya but why do u mention this every chance you get
lol huh
:udontlookok:
dsdsdsd
I only said that cuz the title said gay
:calmdownsis:
Nah
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
!!!! my family is trini indian and once my parents found out my dad stopped talking to me. :kii:
OMG
Does he talk to you now Jono?
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 07:37:37 PM
im white so...
(http://s24.postimg.org/iyln4831x/black_guy_white_girl_smelly_club.png)
Quote from: Jonovan on May 03, 2016, 07:41:46 PM
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
!!!! my family is trini indian and once my parents found out my dad stopped talking to me. :kii:
omf carribean/middle-easterners don't play around when it comes to homosexuality :plzstop:
fortunately, my family moved past it after I let it be known that they either accept who I am and learn to deal accordingly or I'll just have to live life without them :ohwow:
Did they except your illiteracy
(http://s24.postimg.org/iyln4831x/black_guy_white_girl_smelly_club.png)
Quote from: Marie Laveau on May 03, 2016, 07:43:17 PM
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 07:37:37 PM
im white so...
(http://s24.postimg.org/iyln4831x/black_guy_white_girl_smelly_club.png)
go away from me, smelly!(http://s24.postimg.org/iyln4831x/black_guy_white_girl_smelly_club.png)
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:45:04 PM
Quote from: Jonovan on May 03, 2016, 07:41:46 PM
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
!!!! my family is trini indian and once my parents found out my dad stopped talking to me. :kii:
omf carribean/middle-easterners don't play around when it comes to homosexuality :plzstop:
fortunately, my family moved past it after I let it be known that they either accept who I am and learn to deal accordingly or I'll just have to live life without them :ohwow:
rebels! my truth!
Wtf
Yes. My uncles used to call each other sissies as insults all the time when I was little. And I grew up in church so I always heard gay people were going to hell
:omgwatshappening:
I couldn't wait to turn 18 to come out to them
:caramelapple:
Quote from: Marie Laveau on May 03, 2016, 07:49:36 PM
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:45:04 PM
Quote from: Jonovan on May 03, 2016, 07:41:46 PM
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
!!!! my family is trini indian and once my parents found out my dad stopped talking to me. :kii:
omf carribean/middle-easterners don't play around when it comes to homosexuality :plzstop:
fortunately, my family moved past it after I let it be known that they either accept who I am and learn to deal accordingly or I'll just have to live life without them :ohwow:
rebels! my truth!
(http://45.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m10yjxvxLS1rqd01io4_250.gif)
My mother is a Jehovah's Witness and I grew up in the religion as well. Homosexuality isn't tolerated and you'll be immediately ousted from the organization . My father and brother are very very homophobic as well as is one of my sisters so it was difficult and still is to be honest because we are a very close knit family . I have always tried to keep it hidden until about the age of 19. To cope with my parents aynd family's disdain for gays , I just kept it to myself and lived a secret life in the shadows . I refused to live a lie and adopt the attitudes of heteronormativity . You might say I'm in the closet kinda but I'm comfortable with it .
Quote from: Marie Laveau on May 03, 2016, 07:46:15 PM
Did they except your illiteracy
(http://s24.postimg.org/iyln4831x/black_guy_white_girl_smelly_club.png)
You're middle eastern beloved
It's weird homophobia has existed in my community since I can remember, but the thing is the actions didn't match the words.
Like growing up people would talk DOWN on gays. About how they're disgusting, how they'd beat the mess out this gay and that gay, yet these same people would befriend and argue DOWN that someone like Derek J
my mom doesnt know
but if she found out i dont think she would except me
https://www.instagram.com/p/BE4EGOYigtX/
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
!!!!!!!!!
Family isnt Trini' but very religious. Bitch!
You bet not give anybody the slightest idea you gay or the Bibles and prayer cloths would be whipped out in a minute.
:plzstop:
Yes. My fam used to bash me daily. Only one who didn't was my mother. I definitely learned to internalize homophobia. I was smart, awkward, feminine, I enjoyed reading & writing and I got lashed often for it. I attempted to adhere to the behaviors of the "standard" Black men within my neighborhood and at school. Being hyper masculine, shunning at femininity, drugs, fights, and sex with girls (lolz).
It really didnt change until I succumbed to my nature a few years after. That in itself was still a journey cause I still disliked certain things about other gay men and these internalizations were the root of it all. I honestly didnt start becoming completely accepting of others and myself until 2-3 years ago. Even still Im still on that journey trying to get those old pieces of myself back. I still have issues speaking in front of other ppl, especially if they look like me because of that environment.
Quote from: Kurama on May 03, 2016, 08:25:56 PM
Yes. My fam used to bash me daily. Only one who didn't was my mother. I definitely learned to internalize homophobia. I was smart, awkward, feminine, I enjoyed reading & writing and I got lashed often for it. I attempted to adhere to the behaviors of the "standard" Black men within my neighborhood and at school. Being hyper masculine, shunning at femininity, drugs, fights, and sex with girls (lolz).
It really didnt change until I succumbed to my nature a few years after. That in itself was still a journey cause I still disliked certain things about other gay men and these internalizations were the root of it all. I honestly didnt start becoming completely accepting of others and myself until 2-3 years ago. Even still Im still on that journey trying to get those old pieces of myself back. I still have issues speaking in front of other ppl, especially if they look like me because of that environment.
Bre :dead: you never told me this
and the internalization thing is spot on. I'm still unlearning mine at damn near 26.
Awee Bre <333
hmm idk even when my Mom used to be super religious and church going she was never homophobic
My Dad always tried to push that hypermasculine bs on me, but I can't remember instances of him being homophobic per se.
Now my extended family is mostly Caribbean so yeah, definitely some instances there.
:udontlookok:
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 07:37:37 PM
im white so...
bsddddd
As if that exempts you
Heterosexual white men >>>>> you
:usuresis:
Quote from: Glenda on May 03, 2016, 08:51:23 PM
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 07:37:37 PM
im white so...
bsddddd
As if that exempts you
Heterosexual white men >>>>> you
:usuresis:
fck u faggot, it was a joke, take a joke *puffs on my Marlboro*
(http://i68.tinypic.com/2rmlcpi.jpg)
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 08:52:50 PM
Quote from: Glenda on May 03, 2016, 08:51:23 PM
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 07:37:37 PM
im white so...
bsddddd
As if that exempts you
Heterosexual white men >>>>> you
:usuresis:
fck u faggot, it was a joke, take a joke *puffs on my Marlboro*
(http://i68.tinypic.com/2rmlcpi.jpg)
Yeah uh huh
Just be hones' and upfront next time
This is an open discussion meant to inform and help others luv
Join in :heyddy:
Quote from: Glenda on May 03, 2016, 08:54:12 PM
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 08:52:50 PM
Quote from: Glenda on May 03, 2016, 08:51:23 PM
Quote from: yekim on May 03, 2016, 07:37:37 PM
im white so...
bsddddd
As if that exempts you
Heterosexual white men >>>>> you
:usuresis:
fck u faggot, it was a joke, take a joke *puffs on my Marlboro*
(http://i68.tinypic.com/2rmlcpi.jpg)
Yeah uh huh
Just be hones' and upfront next time
This is an open discussion meant to inform and help others luv
Join in :heyddy:
well what do you want me to say? I had a great fucking childhood and no problems at all? cos I fucking did and I wont apologise for it. sorry you all went thru this bullshit, least ur free to fuck and suck whatever and wherever now. jeez louise!
:hmph:
b
(http://s24.postimg.org/iyln4831x/black_guy_white_girl_smelly_club.png)
FFFFFFFFFF
that's inappropriate sis
No
My family for the most part just saw homosexuality as weird
I had a bunch of male straight friends growing up so I only heard gay slurs around them, but I knew I was a Fag early on so it didn't bother me or stick to me
But my mom honestly always taught us to be accepting of people and to assume there's SCUM in EVERY demographic
So that was beneficial for me
However, older black women are like my kryptonite. I feel like they're just SENDING me to hell every time I'm out with my dude. They just bother me. I think it's partly because most of the women in my life ARE black women
We're not making out in the middle of a theater but you can tell we're fucking.
When did you guys enter into your first real relationship? I'm 24 and I haven't had a real relationship with a guy yet, but at the same time I'm not too pressed about it. I'm more focused on my career right now, I want to be rich tbh, but I'm just intrigued to know how it all panned out for some of you guys? :ohwow:
Quote from: Glenda on May 03, 2016, 09:41:26 PM
When did you guys enter into your first real relationship? I'm 24 and I haven't had a real relationship with a guy yet, but at the same time I'm not too pressed about it. I'm more focused on my career right now, I want to be rich tbh, but I'm just intrigued to know how it all panned out for some of you guys? :ohwow:
At 17. It was nice up until he graduated. Usually all of my relationships lasted a year or so then the last one lasted for 7 years.
I just had my first random hookup experience this year.
Quote from: Kurama on May 03, 2016, 09:46:07 PM
Quote from: Glenda on May 03, 2016, 09:41:26 PM
When did you guys enter into your first real relationship? I'm 24 and I haven't had a real relationship with a guy yet, but at the same time I'm not too pressed about it. I'm more focused on my career right now, I want to be rich tbh, but I'm just intrigued to know how it all panned out for some of you guys? :ohwow:
At 17. It was nice up until he graduated. Usually all of my relationships lasted a year or so then the last one lasted for 7 years.
I just had my first random hookup experience this year.
Omffff 7 years? Slay sis.
:stressed:
I'm kinda over hookups. They're so unsubstantial, imo. I'm talking about the Jack'd, Grindr, OkCupid mess. Meeting someone haphazardly at the grocery store is different. But even then. It'd be nice to have something real.
basically dealin wit my moms side..
like no one talks 'bout my luv life & all tht n it use to fckin annoy me after i came out wen i was 14
my great grand papi on my moms saids sumn to me durin a family gatherin one time, i was still in my early teens mind u & thts wen mess began
I went clean tha fck off on him & got attacked by my fam "watch ya mouf!"
ended up gettin into an altercation wit my uncle, cut him hjfnmgf
no lies, i was off tha damn chain in my teens, very angry (still am)
told them i didnt give a fck who they was, i wont be disrespected blah blah snnsnss
my mom pissed me off too cuz wen i firs came out she was weird 'bout it but like...she had a gay ass frien who she 'luved! friends 4evr!"
i kinda started to see her a new light as a fckin hypocrite & jus all 'round stopped talkin' to her & her side of tha fam
i lived wit my dad frm 15 & on
he was a mess but he said he dint understand it but he accepted me & luv me
tht was tha las, he'd ask me wat typa boys i liked & stuff Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnb
damns weed head
luh my ddy tho
& his ex wife (my step mom) was fckin cool
I eventually spoke to my moms, read her & let her kno wat i thought of her attitude towards my sexuality
patched mess up
saw her side of tha fam like 2 yrs ago for tha las time & read tha shit outta them (made a thread on it)
idk why but ive always jus been a no nonsense type of person wen i comes to this or demeaning other ppl for their differences
jus cnt deal wit bigots, hypocrites & ignant ppl and yea im not so innacent either in how i handled situations but as a teen u had alotta mess to go through & bein put down n disrespected for sumthin u cant control by 'family' is sumn i couldnt take
i wanted to kill tht nigger ghbjndfdddd
lol not at all.
XRTFGHBJKlhnfgbvdddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddbdrd
keif join tha group chat
Quote from: Nyan Cat on May 03, 2016, 10:08:06 PM
keif join tha group chat
:usuresis: u keep telling me this without giving any details
Not really
Quote from: Kurama on May 03, 2016, 08:25:56 PM
Yes. My fam used to bash me daily. Only one who didn't was my mother. I definitely learned to internalize homophobia. I was smart, awkward, feminine, I enjoyed reading & writing and I got lashed often for it. I attempted to adhere to the behaviors of the "standard" Black men within my neighborhood and at school. Being hyper masculine, shunning at femininity, drugs, fights, and sex with girls (lolz).
It really didnt change until I succumbed to my nature a few years after. That in itself was still a journey cause I still disliked certain things about other gay men and these internalizations were the root of it all. I honestly didnt start becoming completely accepting of others and myself until 2-3 years ago. Even still Im still on that journey trying to get those old pieces of myself back. I still have issues speaking in front of other ppl, especially if they look like me because of that environment.
It's crazy how society prevents ppl from reaching their full potential at such a young age. I believe soon you'll be able to gain full clarity of yourself and look at those past mistreatments as the building blocks that helped make you the strong, beautiful human you are today.
I forgot to say that im not gay :ohwow:
Quote from: Nyan Cat on May 03, 2016, 10:01:23 PM
basically dealin wit my moms side..
like no one talks 'bout my luv life & all tht n it use to fckin annoy me after i came out wen i was 14
my great grand papi on my moms saids sumn to me durin a family gatherin one time, i was still in my early teens mind u & thts wen mess began
I went clean tha fck off on him & got attacked by my fam "watch ya mouf!"
ended up gettin into an altercation wit my uncle, cut him hjfnmgf
no lies, i was off tha damn chain in my teens, very angry (still am)
told them i didnt give a fck who they was, i wont be disrespected blah blah snnsnss
my mom pissed me off too cuz wen i firs came out she was weird 'bout it but like...she had a gay ass frien who she 'luved! friends 4evr!"
i kinda started to see her a new light as a fckin hypocrite & jus all 'round stopped talkin' to her & her side of tha fam
i lived wit my dad frm 15 & on
he was a mess but he said he dint understand it but he accepted me & luv me
tht was tha las, he'd ask me wat typa boys i liked & stuff Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnb
damns weed head
luh my ddy tho
& his ex wife (my step mom) was fckin cool
I eventually spoke to my moms, read her & let her kno wat i thought of her attitude towards my sexuality
patched mess up
saw her side of tha fam like 2 yrs ago for tha las time & read tha shit outta them (made a thread on it)
idk why but ive always jus been a no nonsense type of person wen i comes to this or demeaning other ppl for their differences
jus cnt deal wit bigots, hypocrites & ignant ppl and yea im not so innacent either in how i handled situations but as a teen u had alotta mess to go through & bein put down n disrespected for sumthin u cant control by 'family' is sumn i couldnt take
i wanted to kill tht nigger ghbjndfdddd
teach them IDIOTS, hun
(http://i.imgur.com/qkKRD1S.gif)
Yeah my parents are African and super religious so you can imagine that they do not tolerate homosexuality at all. :dead: Always talking about gays being immoral, going to hell, the end of days etc.
But tbh, it didn't really affect my behaviour growing up. As a kid, I always liked 'girly' things (me and my sister used to always play dressup in her dresses :dead: ) but they never once scolded me for it. I remember my dad tried so hard to get me into football/soccer but I just wasn't here for it tbh.
As I got older, I realised that I was 'different' and it kinda affected my behaviour, not just at home but overall. I tried hard to distance myself from homosexuality and developed a boring, uninteresting personality during my high school years which I still regret to this day because high school sucked because of it.
I'm still not out to my family (or anyone else, really) but I'm pretty sure my sisters know my tea at this stage. I'm planning on telling my parents as soon as I'm financially independent from them, which should be in the next year or so. My dad most likely won't take it too well but I feel like my mum would come around to it.
Quote from: Cartier on May 04, 2016, 02:07:41 AM
Yeah my parents are African and super religious so you can imagine that they do not tolerate homosexuality at all. :dead: Always talking about gays being immoral, going to hell, the end of days etc.
But tbh, it didn't really affect my behaviour growing up. As a kid, I always liked 'girly' things (me and my sister used to always play dressup in her dresses :dead: ) but they never once scolded me for it. I remember my dad tried so hard to get me into football/soccer but I just wasn't here for it tbh.
As I got older, I realised that I was 'different' and it kinda affected my behaviour, not just at home but overall. I tried hard to distance myself from homosexuality and developed a boring, uninteresting personality during my high school years which I still regret to this day because high school sucked because of it.
I'm still not out to my family (or anyone else, really) but I'm pretty sure my sisters know my tea at this stage. I'm planning on telling my parents as soon as I'm financially independent from them, which should be in the next year or so. My dad most likely won't take it too well but I feel like my mum would come around to it.
:stressed:
Quote from: Cartier on May 04, 2016, 02:07:41 AM
Yeah my parents are African and super religious so you can imagine that they do not tolerate homosexuality at all. :dead: Always talking about gays being immoral, going to hell, the end of days etc.
But tbh, it didn't really affect my behaviour growing up. As a kid, I always liked 'girly' things (me and my sister used to always play dressup in her dresses :dead: ) but they never once scolded me for it. I remember my dad tried so hard to get me into football/soccer but I just wasn't here for it tbh.
As I got older, I realised that I was 'different' and it kinda affected my behaviour, not just at home but overall. I tried hard to distance myself from homosexuality and developed a boring, uninteresting personality during my high school years which I still regret to this day because high school sucked because of it.
I'm still not out to my family (or anyone else, really) but I'm pretty sure my sisters know my tea at this stage. I'm planning on telling my parents as soon as I'm financially independent from them, which should be in the next year or so. My dad most likely won't take it too well but I feel like my mum would come around to it.
OMG
:kii: :kii: :kii:
This is eerie
I waited until my parents weren't paying my rent And until I had my career on track before I stopped putting up a facade for them
My dad is Kenyan and financed me when I moved away for school.
I wasn't having him tell me I was cut off
:nowgorl:
Now that I'm set, my mom and I are finally having these conversations
:rthosehotwings:
Love hearing these stories.
Strong selves.
Anyone from the Caribbean region knows how inherently homophobic persons are here, so yes. VERY homophobic. My Mom wasn't like that though. It was easy to come out to her.
Thanks yall!
:stressed:
Quote from: ANIMMAI on May 03, 2016, 07:27:03 PM
my family is trinidadian so that 'batty boy' foolishness was never tolerated. :dead:
if anything, it made me more introverted and quiet; don't talk too much or get too comfortable because they might clock your tea at any given moment.
it was a very exhausting way to live, glad I've moved past that.
aw I'm glad you got away from that. If there's one thing we can all relate to (to an extent) it's that. Having to either keep quiet or be someone else entirely, and it's a mess. It's just crazy to think about now, because I can't imagine not being myself
I think it was ok at a time when I was still searching and figuring myself out, in total. Covering up my sexuality wasn't a big deal and it was pretty easy in my mind because I didn't completely know who I was in the first place. Smh
My family is fine overall, but my main issues were in school. Can't believe I used to try and fit in.eek. I can't imagine that now