I genuinely find you see-through.
While some may enjoy watching you crash and crumble, I see a person desiring acceptance and something to attach themselves to that's tangible.
Outside of all of your features being black, there's a large part of you that actually hates that. Instead of you admitting that, you use this place as the headquarters of your self esteem and a platform to excavate tidbits on who and what may have been stirred in a pot to still produce a black man.